Here Are Some Signs Your Frontal Lobe May Be Finished Forming

The frontal lobe finishes forming in your late 20s. It plays a major role in reasoning and decision-making.
  • You go out to lunch with your mother willingly… weird…
  • You hate concerts and loud noises.
  • If you had to pick, the only concert you enjoyed this year was Lana Del Rey because the people there were 25+ and understood the concept of personal space.
  • Being horizontal on the couch watching LMN now takes priority over drinking on a Friday night.
  • When you do drink, you decide to have a glass of water after 1 bottle of wine. Here’s to your health!
  • At dinner, you stop eating when you’re full. Later on, as a reward, you consume an entire package of croutons because that’s the closest thing you have to chips ATM.
  • You quit cigarettes because you play out getting diagnosed with cancer in your head and now you’re convinced that you’re dying. According to the symptoms on WebMD, you’re already dead.
  • You go on a blocking spree on social media and honestly it’s a great replacement behavior for pulling your hair and/or smoking cigs.
  • You realize you may want kids after all, despite the mental illness and bizarre-shaped ears that run rampant in your gene pool.
  • You can’t shop at Urban Outfitters anymore. In fact, you probably never should have. Who do you think you are, fuckin’ Hailey Baldwin? Put the crop top down.

Haileyyyyy! Over here, Hailey!
  • You tell your parents how much drugs you did in college. They start crying.
  • You tell your parents you were kidding about the whole drug thing (you weren’t), and go out of your way to thank them for paying your rent. They ask if you’re high.
  • You take your makeup off every night. Gold star!
  • You ask your mom for her sauce recipe. She starts crying again!
  • You begin to incorporate more veggies into your pre-diabetic, childlike diet, but only because veggies make you poo.
  • You conclude that shoving the mouth-breathing slow walker in front of you into oncoming traffic is probably not the best thing for your journey right now.
  • You quit comedy.
  • You get pretty good at pointing out bad wigs on TV.

Bad wig AND bad plastic surgery!
  • You think about going to the movies by yourself. You end up not going, but still…
  • You love dogs and think about fostering one, but your frontal lobe tells you that you can barely take care of yourself, so you just follow more dog accounts on Instagram as an alternative.
  • You force yourself to exercise more. And by exercise I mean you sometimes take the stairs. Going down. If the elevator is being slow.
  • You decide to get a haircut and highlights. You look like an annoying fashion blogger from the scalp up.

Tre girlini! Hehehe!

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