Sorry I Forgot Father’s Day, Dad. I Was Out Celebrating National Stewart’s Root Beer Day.  

drink beer cheers toast
Photo by Tookapic on

Dear Dad,

Okay so I guess I didn’t “forget” Father’s Day, it just happened to fall on June 17th, a NATIONAL Holiday, which unfortunately takes precedence…and that’s just a government thing. And Dad you know I love you, I don’t have to tell you that. You taught me everything I know.

Think about it this way, if you didn’t teach me how to drive, I wouldn’t have been able to go to the last standing Stewart’s location in the state of New York on their big day. And yes I know that’s a long drive from our house in Ohio, but the one on Main Street closed due to a health inspection.

And the gratitude goes even further back! Like, if you hadn’t been staying in that motel after you and mom divorced, how would I ever know how to work a vending machine? And if you hadn’t immigrated here from Germany as a kid, I would have never been able to enjoy American consumerism!

I don’t mean to rub salt in the wound, but Father’s Day was big for me this year. It was my 12th National Stewart’s Root Beer Day (or as us die-hards call it, National Stew Brew day), and it was a memorable one. Everyone got free Corn Dog Nuggets with a purchase of a Root Beer Float. And I don’t want you to think that a Root Beer Float outweighs my love for you! Maybe an Orange N’ Cream float, but certainly not a Root Beer.

As I sat in my corner booth alone, I watched a young kid in his baseball uniform enjoy a burger and fries with his dad. It hit home for me. It reminded me of the times we used to go to Stewart’s after my stage productions of “A League of Their Own” and you’d tell me that it’s seriously not okay to drink more than one root beer because of the massive amount of sugar in them.

It was that exact moment I thought to myself, “Oh fuck, it’s Father’s Day.” I immediately tried to call, but the grease on my hands from the Corn Dog Nuggets made it hard to dial, and Siri just kept calling “Dan” so I ended up talking to him for awhile, which was honestly really nice. He’s doing a lot better now that he’s in rehab.

If it makes any difference, I had to write Mom a similar letter. I totally blanked on Mother’s Day this year because I went to see Deadpool 2, but can you blame me?  I’d honestly love to make it up to you and take you out for your birthday in November. Actually, now that I’m looking at it, that’s National Deviled Egg Day and I’ve definitely got plans…but maybe the week after.



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