A Gaslighter’s Guide to Psychopathy for Expectant Parents

silhouette of pregnant standing on seashore during golden hour
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Science isn’t too sure about what causes psychopathy, so really there’s nothing you can do. Maybe just don’t worry about it.

Also, everyone agrees that psychopathy is basically impossible to treat, which means no tough healthcare decisions to make. That should give you peace of mind.

Ok sure, some studies suggest that stress during pregnancy can help cause psychopathy. Just more reason to chill out about the random chance your baby will be a psychopath.

As long as you’re looking at research, note that poor attachment in infancy might also play a role. I guess it’s time to get over that fear of being touched and just generally calm down.

Or maybe you won’t even notice that your kid is a psychopath. They’re great manipulators, after all. I’m sure no one will hold you accountable for something you don’t know about.

Unless you keep stressing about it. Maybe you should just stop stressing about it.

And psychopaths aren’t even as bad as people say. They do actually have emotions, just shallower ones. At least you won’t have to deal with a hyperemotional teen.

What about the perks? You could have a psychopath who identifies as female. They’re super rare and you might get to go on Oprah (or Maury at least).

What if you just spent more time thinking about Oprah in general. She’s chill as hell.

Also, Washington DC is full of psychopaths apparently, so your kid will probably just end up there and everything will be fine.

And what if you’re just being self-centered about this whole thing? Psychopaths enjoy life. To them, there’s nothing wrong with their worldview or behavior. It’s just the rest of you that need to cool it.

So mellow out and remember that psychopathy exists on a spectrum, which means that we’re all a little psychopathic.

Warmly,
Your Hypothalamus

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