- Just try to finish.
- It’s super unfulfilling now, but eventually, I hope to enjoy it.
- This is way better than real human interaction.
- It’s harder with my pants on, but not impossible!
- I need a pillow for back support.
- How do people do this on the subway?
- I think I’d understand how to do this if my stomach weren’t full of cheese.
- Try to devote twenty minutes to it every morning.
- It’s hard to get my reps in now that commercial breaks are becoming extinct.
- I’m best at it right after my period.
- The only valid excuse to stop is carpal tunnel.
- I started taking this seriously too late in life.
- They should really teach this in school.
- I’m self-critical enough that I don’t need someone else to tell me what I’m doing wrong.
- I’ve had so many rejections, I do this for no one’s pleasure but my own.
- These struggles will be great fodder for my memoir one day.
- So this is the shape my Patronus takes!
Little Old Lady Comedy 