A Guide To Visiting Our Cat Café

Photo by Roman Koval on Pexels.com

Welcome to Feline Thirsty”, the first cat café that promises you lots of cat snuggles AND a latte with hair in it! Is it human or cat hair? We’re not entirely sure! 

Before we let you near the cats, we ask for a small donation. While the fee isn’t mandatory, if you don’t pay the recommended $14-20, we will ask that you sit in a poorly-lit room and watch the ASPCA commercial on animal cruelty featuring Sarah McLachlan’s hauntingly beautiful song, Angel. Feeling guilty yet? Great! Now it’s time to head on over to see the cats.

Now — or MEOW– that you’re inside the cat room, tough luck getting out! Any attempt you make an exit is a chance for Wilson, our most “curious” cat, to run in front of you and out into the street. 

Hungry? Feline Thirsty has a wide variety of tasty treats for you to enjoy — made in the same backroom that we clean the litter boxes! Some of our most popular snacks include peanut butter cookies, croissants, and milk bones that we’re marketing as edible for humans. 

There’s only one rule in our cat café and it’s that you have to let the cats do whatever they want. Did Princess Leila, a gorgeous sphinx cat, just pee in your shoe? That means it’s hers now. So cute! Balance your commentary drink in one hand while a cat named Mr. Butterworth aggressively shoves his rear-end in the direction of your face. Be warned, though, if you put your drink down, Mr. Butterworth WILL try to have some of it and feeding the cats is strictly prohibited.

Want to play with one of our calmer cats? I’d recommend Violet! She’s a Persian shorthair who loves to be pet everywhere except one very specific spot on her right ear. Touch that ear and so help you God, she’ll claw your eyes out. She loves having her chin pet, though! 

At some point during your visit at Feline Thirsty you may notice a pair of beady, menacing eyes watching you from inside a castle-shaped crate in the corner. That’s Beans, our shyest boy! Beans is perfectly harmless, unless of course he feels like you’re encroaching on his territory, in which case he may enter “attack mode”. Should this happen, you’ll just want to back up slowly without making direct eye contact until you’re safely out of the cat room. Watch the door though, here comes Wilson!

Once your visit to Feline Thirsty has come to a close, we’ll ask you to exit the cat room, taking with you all of your belongings — except for the shoe that Princess Leila has marked as hers. After a brief, pressure-free, questionnaire asking about your future interest in adopting one of our fur-babies where you can either select “yes” or “maybe,” you’re free to go! See you again soon…

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