
MAINS
Turkey giblets
Twice-digested turkey giblet casserole with sautéed celery
Rando leaves and blades of grass, with creamy pumpkin sauce
Cranberry urinary support supplement (tuck into a generous layer of pureed meat)
Spiders, with apple-walnut and sage butter hairball support laxative
Any goddamned thing on the counter
Oak-aged kibble (retrieve from under desks and rugs)
Flies
DON’T FORGET THE SAVORY SIDES!
Yams (coat with dirt)
Minty floss (coat with pureed meat)
Cold-weather duvet string (coat generously with pureed meat)
Rustic rosemary pull-apart rolls (place on counter until gently mouthed and mauled)
Old Post-its
Fur
DESSERT
Whipped cream, straight from can
Dust bunnies (collect, sprinkle liberally with pumpkin pie spice)
Salted caramel spiders
Flies
Any goddamned thing on the floor
SERVE WITH
November-chilled floor water
November-chilled toilet water
Fine Kentucky Bourbon
Spiders
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