Family Refrigerator Dies Expectedly At 17

The Hix family Refrigerator, 17 years of age, passed away last night in its home after a long life of keeping perishables fresh, and storing weird eye-drop medicine in its side door.  

Lovingly known to the the Hix family as “Fridge,” Refrigerator was born in Ohio along with its 16,000 siblings on January 15th, 2003. Upon moving in with the Hix family that year, Refrigerator settled into the northwest corner of the kitchen, covering up a medium-sized dent in the linoleum. Refrigerator enjoyed being cleaned, and took pride in keeping celery crisp so the Hix family could fully enjoy their Sunday morning Bloody Marys. Refrigerator didn’t mind being spilled in occasionally; it was known for its cool-tempered nature and cool temperature.

Refrigerator (“Fridge”) is survived by Dent in the Linoleum, and 577 of its original 16,000 siblings.

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