- Me suing my ex for dumping me.
- Women suing our periods for…all of it.
- My mom suing me for that time I cried in a Target because she wouldn’t get me a new Roomba.
- Me suing my mom for not getting me a new Roomba.
- Me suing the wind for $10 because it once made a $1 bill blow away. Who knows what that $1 would be worth now.
- Viewers suing This Is Us for making us cry.
- Me suing water for my broken iPhone. I’ve tried and failed at this many, many times. I’ll be honest, it was Diet Coke. I wanted to sound more wholesome in my complaint.
- Dogs suing rabbits for distracting them from their goal of sleeping all day.
- Homes suing earthquakes for giving them anxiety.
- The Ozone suing humans for destroying it.
- The human race suing God for this whole stupid mess.
- Users suing Twitter for wasting our time. Actually, I stand by this one.
