How To Work From Home When Your House Is Full Of Bees
- First off, count your bees. Call out, “Alexa, what is the number of bees in my house?” She will know. She sees everything.
- Show no signs of weakness. As the swarm descends upon you, calmly type some emails. The bees might leave you alone when they see your strong work ethic.
- When the bees grow more irritable, sing “Landslide” by Fleetwood Mac to them. Make sure you’re muted on that Zoom call with your coworkers. The song might soothe the bees.
- When that fails, log in to Netflix and put on the Bee Movie. Build a rapport with the bees. Let them know you understand their struggles.
- Pour some honey into a bowl and set it out for the bees. This will distract them long enough for you to message a client. (Yes, this counts as working.)
- Carefully search for a yellow shirt and black pants. Put them on. The bees need to know you’re one of them.
- Name the bees, one by one. That’s Deborah. That one’s Greg. Here comes Bill. There’s Shirley swiping a bread crumb off of the floor. Start feeling like a proud bee parent. You are one now.
- Abandon all of your responsibilities and lead your swarm into the nearest forest. This is your new home. You might as well accept it.