We were the first men living on Mars, if you could call that living.
I was about to complain to Gary about the heat, but he had already melted.
It certainly was satisfying to grow your own food, I thought, as I sat down to a nice, warm bowl of dirt.
As if the first day of third grade wasn’t stressful enough, now I had to explain to everyone that I did own pants, I just forgot them.
The Pointy Thing
I didn’t know what it was, but it was a mistake to think it was a chair.
Our New House
I know the realtor was really persuasive, but I still wasn’t totally convinced that was a roof.
A Day At The Zoo
I didn’t think it was fair to lock up the monkeys in a cage, or at the very least, not me.
It wasn’t what I would call “music,” more like people telling me that I was talking too loudly.
The Haunted House
I didn’t believe in ghosts, not after the way that last one lied to me.
A Night Out
I was led to believe it was going to be a fancy restaurant, but when we sat down, I was the only one eating a necktie.
When I was a boy, my grandmother made the most delicious apple pie I ever tasted, until I was in college and learned you were supposed to cook it first.
The Worst Day Of My Life
This isn’t so bad, I thought.
The Human Cannonball
It didn’t seem like a great strategy to me, but who was I to question my commanding officer?