Limited Series: Andrew Zimmern’s Bizarre Foods Made Possible By Asshole Pet Owners

illustration by Olatokunbo B.

by Rochelle Elana Fisher

Andrew Zimmern from The Travel Channel is back with some more Bizarre Food episodes. This time, he’s traveling through the USA where he will dine on pets adopted during quarantine who are no longer wanted by their owners–now that things are opening up again. 

Episode 1: Andrew visits Boston where he tastes hearty chicken coup soup made from the backyard hens of a family who has returned to work and school now that everyone’s been vaccinated. He helps dismantle their coup as he learns how annoying it was to live with the smell and the constant cock-a-doodle-doos at dawn.

Episode 2: Follow Andrew to the Hamptons where he enjoys foie gras made from ducks which originally came to the family as eggs in the mail for Easter during the pandemic. He hears about how the ducks would often be found flapping around in the family’s huge outdoor pool which was gross, especially when the kids wanted to swim — which was all day, every day.

Episode 3: Come along with Andrew to Pittsburgh and discover how one mom turned her pet fish into a week’s worth of dinner when she didn’t want to clean the tank anymore. Andrew tries goldfish patties, rainbow fish lox, and red and blue popcorn flavored with the skin of betta fish.

Episode 4: Andrew stops in Denver for some skiing before joining a young boy and his family for reptile pie, made from the turtles the boy accidentally tried to flush down the toilet when no one was watching.

Episode 5: As Ohio reopens, Andrew feasts on bunny burgers in Cleveland — sourced from one family’s mini lop who pooped balls of shit the whole day — around the entire house. Plus, he does shots of bunny pee and experiences the smell, which is ‘very pungent and impossible to get out of carpet.’

Episode 6: Join Andrew in the entertainment capital of the world, Las Vegas. He samples kabobs made from the meat of a Persian kitten owned by a family of five who had no idea it would shed that much.

Episode 7: Andrew stops by a family of three in Orlando for a sampling of Blooming Hedgehog. This dish was inspired when the dad realized the hedgehog gave them no love in return for constant cage cleaning. Then, Andrew swims with sea lions at Seaworld before enjoying hermit crab ceviche at the home of the same family.

Episode 8: This week, Andrew will be in Maine for a taste of savory coyote sausage made from the intestines of the animal a father domesticated for his son during corona. But now with everyone out of the house again, who will walk it?

Season Finale: As life returns to some normalcy post-pandemic, get a glimpse into family life in Austin. Andrew joins locals for dinner where he tries hamster meatballs. He also learns how many unwanted baby hamsters went into the scrumptious dish before he downs the blood of the ‘dumbest parrot ever.’

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