Grand Opening of our New Eatery: The Ex-English Teacher Cafe! Here’s Our Punny Menu!

Everything here is always cooked As You Like It!

~Drink Menu~


The Grapes of Wrath Dry Merlot

The Picture of Dorian Gray: Aging like a Fine Chardonnay

The Scarlet Letter: “A” for Apothic Red

The Cask of Amontillado Aged Sherry


Treasure Island Pina Colada

House on Mango Street’s Fresh Mango Margarita

Jekyll and Hyde’s “Poison” Rum Cocktail

Tom Buchanan’s The Great Gatsby: Gin, Lime & Club Soda

Tequila “The Sun Also Rises” Sunrise

A Clockwork Orange Creamsicle Cocktail

~Dinner Menu~


The Hunger Games “Peeta” Bread with Hummus

Raisin in the Sun Raisin Breadbasket

A Passage to India Curried Tomato Lentil Dip

Seabiscuits and Gravy

Soups & Salads:

The Tragedy of Julius Caesar Salad

Leaves of Grass Mixed Green Salad

The Secret Garden Salad

Macbeth’s Three Witches: Snake, Newt, & Frog Soup Cauldron

The Catcher in the Rye Bread Bowl of New York Style Minestrone


The Pearl Clams Casino

The Old Man and the Sea’s Fish Tacos

Hatchet-speared Fire Grilled Crayfish

20,000 Leagues Under the Seafood Paella

The Odyssey Seafood Scampi


Animal Farm-Raised Pig Roast

Slaughterhouse 5-oz Filet Mignon

Because it is a sin To Kill a Mockingbird: Chicken Skewers

Things Fall Apart Beef Pot Roast

The Diary of Anne Frankfurters & Fries

Naked Lunch Turkey Club

Lord of the Flies Special: Pigs in a Blanket

Side Dishes:

Peter Pan-Fried Asparagus

Dracula’s Garlic Mashed Potatoes

White Fang’s Yukon Gold Hasselback Potatoes

Harry Potter & the Goblet of Fire-grilled Artichokes

~Dessert Menu~

James and the Giant Peach Cobbler

Blueberry, Raspberry, & Huckleberry Finn Fruit Tart

Fahrenheit 451-Torched Creme Brulee

Life of Apple Pi

Brave New World-Renowned Chocolate Eclairs

Edmund’s The Lion, The Witch & The Wardrobe Turkish Delight

Call of the Wild Klondike Bar

The Chocolate War’s Molten Chocolate Cake

Everything here is always cooked As You Like It!

Thank you for visiting our restaurant! 

Too full to eat it all? Just ask for an Old Yeller Doggy Bag!

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