Birds In Retirement

The complaint.
– – So, how is your father doing?… That was your mother on the phone, right?
– – Right… She took him to Dr. Fruman.
– – Okay.
– – She explained the problem… Since his retirement, Dad spends more and more time sitting around, watching the news… And he gets more and more upset.
– – Who wouldn’t?
– – But it’s not good… He gets upset that the big corporations are taking advantage of the little guy… He goes on and on about politics tearing things apart.
– – So, what did Dr. Fruman say?
– – He asked Dad if he didn’t want to get a dog.
– – Isn’t your father allergic?
– – I guess the Doctor forgot that…

Diagnosis and treatment.
– – Anyway… You remember that Dr. Fruman suggested a hobby.
– – Bird watching?
– – Well, kind of… They started with just getting a birdfeeder… You know, one that hung from a tree branch near the kitchen window.
– – Right.
– – So what happened is, the squirrels got into it.
– – Didn’t they get a squirrel-proof one?
– – Not initially… They got rid of the first one and got a squirrel-proof one… Then the big birds, the jays and all, began to push out the little sparrows… They began to hog everything.

– – It got so that even Mother was a little upset.
– – Seeing the jays push the birds around?
– – I guess so… Of course, by this time, they had to get a third birdfeeder, one that could keep the rain off the birds.
– – What did Dr. Fruman say?
– – He listened… And, he said it confirmed what he’d always thought.
– – Thought?
– – Yeah… That it’s a dog-eat-dog world…

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